Saturday, April 30, 2005
lost
I feel so lost, dunno what to do, dunno what i can do, dunno what i really want, dunno what future beholds for me. i hate this kind of feeling of uncertainty. I want to be in ctrl of my own life but i dunno how. Watched tv the whole day, practically the whole day until my head aches. Just want to forget abt my own life and be engrossed in the lives inside the show. There are a lot of nice shows, watched tv3 jian ke hosted by xiao zhu and hei ren. They helped a wife to investigate abt her husband as she suspect he had a mistress outside but end up the conclusion is her husband's company was bankrupt but he goes to work evryday as normal as he do not want her to worry abt it, so sad, what a nice guy. Then, after this show got huang jin bao lin qiu acted by jin cheng wu, jin cheng wu is very handsome and the show is very nice! Before that, i still watched starry night by qiu ze, peter and yi rong, okay la, quite nice. After all these, i watched you hua jiu jiang and after that zhen qing. Kaoz, i really watched a lot of shows today. Actually, wanted to go rent vcd one but there is too much shows to watch le, no need to go and rent at all. I am very scared that i will forget that i actually need to go back for exams nxt tues cos i really no mood for exams le. Haiz, i sent a lot of resumes to those companies but none of them get back to me yet, sian, i hate the process of finding a job.
Zhen is working in bp as relief teacher, it has always been my dream to go back bp and teach but whenever i wanted to, they wun need teachers and holidays is coming soon, dun think they need any teachers at this time. Will i really end up going my dad's company to work? i really dun feel like going there cos his boss think i very smart like that but actually, i still haven't even learn abt the basics of accouting yet and they are closing their accouts in june, think i go there create more trouble for them only, that will be my last way out.
9:54 PM